best of 2008

since everyone else was doing it...

why? - alopecia
mates of state - rearrange us

yup, that's about it.

UNBROKEN - NOVEMBER 28.98 - PART 1

reunion shows in may.
if i cant make the cali date i may try to make it to chicago.
best shit ever.

last night on the mass pike

i am literally physically ill after viewing this.
i thought it was a joke. it's not.

the L train at 245am

this dude was playing the guitar, and since we all had 10 mins to wait
for the train, everyone else on the platform started singing along with
him and it was just a fun moment in time to be a part of. he even came
onto the train and sang a prince song and everyone, all the strangers
and people who normally wouldn't talk to each other, sang along with
smiles. this is what makes nyc a city like no other in the world and
why i'm happy i am maybe, just maaaaaaaybe, starting to call this place
home.

PS...fuck you L train. its 3am and im tired and i worked all day. not
only are you not running to 8th ave (making me walk to union sq from
highline) but you just made me get off at bedford and wait another 10
mins for a train to take me one more stop to my house.

every time someone is reading on the subway i always look and see what
it is. there's so many books that look interesting that i want to read.

O'Reilly Smears San Francisco With Surreal Pseudo-Documentary

this fills me with two emotions...

1. i really hate you so much bill oreilly.
2. i'm proud to call this place home! fuck yea!

(and major lol moment " i wouldn't go into the presidio at night".)

i moved to new york and became an awful blogger. i'm sorry.

welcome to new york

samantha pleet

proenza schouler

interesting.

but also extremely depressing and scary. the fact that i have to trust my government to help out middle class americans is the most terrifying.

kill

Well, you're just across the street
Looks a mile to my feet
I want to go to you
Funny how I'm nervous still
I've always been the easy kill
I guess I always will

Could it be that everything goes 'round by chance?
Or only one way that it was always meant to be
You kill me, you always know the perfect thing to say
I know what I should do, but I just can't walk away

I can picture your face well
From the bar in my hotel
I wish I'd go to you
I pick up put down the phone
Like your favorite Heatmeiser song goes
It's just like being alone

Oh God, please don't tell me this has been in vain
I need answers for what all the waiting I've done means
You kill me, you've got some nerve, but can't face your mistakes
I know what I should do, but I just can't turn away

So go on love
Leave while there's still hope for escape
Got to take what you can these days
There's so much ahead
So much regret
I know what you want to say
I know it but can't help feeling differently
I loved you, and I should have said it
But tell me just what has it ever meant

I can't help it baby, this is who I am
Sorry, but I can't just go turn off how I feel
You kill me, you build me up, but just to watch me break
I know what I should do, but I just can't walk away

so tragic!

i'm not a religious person at all, but my thoughts and prayers go out to everyone on that flight. i hope the two boys can pull through.

yes!

this might be the most amazing thing i have ever read!

staring at the sun

i've been bad at updating this thing lately. my girl teresa was in town in between tours for the past two weeks and since she was living with me, we kinda became the same person. our days consisted of sitting in bed gossiping all morning, eating, napping, and then partying. i went to work a lot in that time frame as well, got in a fight with my boss while she was wasted, and was then subsequently told i "text too much" while at work. HA! trying to explain AIM on a sidekick to my aging general manager is a mute point, so i just nodded my head and said "yes you are correct. this job is boring most of the time, i need something to keep me occupied."

i have about 2 weeks left until i need to be completely moved out of my little apartment on haight street. i'm no good at packing and my house is a veritable disaster area. i packed up a box of dvd's to ship and proceeded to unpack that box a week later when i wanted to watch bottle rocket. so much for living like i'm on vacation in my own home.

i took my cat to the vet. he's certified to fly with me now. i don't think he really understands moving though, so i'll let him have a minor heart attack when we board the plane. flying is uncomfortable and boring and claustrophobic for me, i don't know how a little animal is going to handle it, but i suppose we will see.

i'm going to treasure island music fest on saturday after finagling a saturday night off work. sunday is devoted to mike v and the east bay and some serious brodown time before i leave the west.

my heart is all upside down and turned around. the relationship is a complete mess and coupled with my bad timing and his ability to never be home, i think it's probably for the best, but i can't help but wonder if maybe he was my cue to stay and i'm not reading into fate the way i should. but as i told him, "i cannot stay here." it's terribly hard though and i just keep telling myself, "if it's meant to be, it's meant to be." maybe fate will have a funny way of fixing this whole situation.

i'm incredibly scared i may be doing the wrong thing, but incredibly excited that, no matter what, i'm doing it.

srsly

it's weird. after 26 years, i officially have one month left in san
francisco.

i know i've linked to her blog before but...
this post couldn't have come at a more perfect time. there's someone else out there!

wherever you go, there you are

i'm full of excitement, anxiety, stress, melancholy, and relief.
i've never done this before and i'm really scared.
i quit my job, which terrifies me as much as it makes me oh-so-happy.
my mind won't stop racing.
i know i need support but i'm too proud to ask.
and the people who are seemingly so close to me, don't seem to want to encourage my goals.
to them " new york isn't that cool, it's all in my head."
of course it's in my head, if i have experienced it, i trust myself (i think?) to make an adult decision as to whether or not it will be good for me.
i'm straddling two coasts right now and neither one feels like home.

unusual

funny joke

or maybe only to me...

a tour manager, a FOH guy, and a monitors tech are all hanging at the sound board when they find an old lamp. one of them picks it up and out pops a genie. the genie will grant each one of them one wish.

the FOH guy says "man, i want be on an island with the best sound system in the world, listening to reggae, drinking cold beer, and being surrounded by 500 of the hottest 19 year old girls thirsty for sex." BOOM. wish granted, he disappears.

the monitor tech says "i want to be in the dirtiest, crappiest club in berlin, listening to minimal house, a shit ton of cocaine, and all the broken winged dismal raver goth girls in the world." BOOM. wish granted, he disappears.

the tour manager says "i want both those guys back here in ten minutes."

a lil of what i missed...

i wish i coulda been in chicago this past weekend with everyone. the videos i've seen of radiohead's set are pretty epic.

no fucking way!

welcome to boston

new england, home sweet second home.

from sfo

the time and price.

"you better choose your words carefully, cause i'm not your anything."

will someone please buy this for me?

if you are unfamiliar with the burn to shine series, ex fugazi drummer brendan canty and filmmaker christoph green choose a house that is set for demolition in a certain city. they ask a member of a local band to curate a "show" and they tape it live, each band gets about an hour to set up. no corrections, just unadultered music making at it's finest. it's pretty awesome stuff, they usually tell the story about the house before and after the performances.

seriously? i will totally buy this book.
and that video clip at the end is pure fucking gold.

in other news, i'm completely distressed over a situation that i shouldn't be, i'm overanalyzing every single thing that is happening in my life and thus, driving myself crazy.

i really do like you. for the first time in a long time. please don't play careless with this fragile heart of mine.

a complaint

an open letter to any environment california/children international/aclu/whatever the "would you like to help homeless women and children today?" organization is employees:

when you stand on the corner of haight ashbury and try and get tourists to give you money, please only try and talk to the people who look like they may want to talk to you. it's usually the morning and i'm walking to get coffee (which means i don't like you. the environment, children, homeless people, and mornings) and diverting my gaze or "trying to find something in my purse" doesn't always seem to work. mainly its the one annoying ass dude with dreadlocks that KNOWS i walk down the street everyday and has now stopped asking me for help, but inserts his equally annoying "how are you today miss?" and when i don't respond he proceeds to say something condescending about the fact that i'm not smiling and how i should smile. shut the fuck up you hippie fucking slacker. i hate you.

yesterday

so swoonworthy.
good thing you can't see me and sadaf lurking on the side of the stage.

the bar across the street is blasting that i kissed a girl song so loud
right now.

still waiting for this.

i think if i could have one super power it would be to speak every
foreign language effortlessly.

meee-owwww

uh oh...

i love being the singer on rock band.

i knew it was coming for awhile, although BGP losing the warfield was a sort of internal blow to the hierarchy and legacy of SF live music. the final party may have been more fun had it not taken place during a phil lesh show. grateful dead, do no want. an old hippie definitely spit all over my face while trying to talk to me.

agony and irony

now that i've had a couple weeks to listen to this entire record and let it sink in, i will say that i like it. when i saw them live a couple months ago they played help me and in vein. i really liked the songs then, but then the released a 3 song EP on itunes and after giving the songs more listen, i became disillusioned with the band (ps, i definitely saw them on the hills) and had little hope for a new goddamnit. now i dont think bands need to try to constantly create a sound they owned 10 years ago, in fact, i would be rather dissappointed if this were the case, but a certain part of me will never fall out of love with the gritty alcoholic meanderings of a lovelorn matt skiba. a quick rundown of the tracks from my own very biased opinion...

calling all skeletons - a stellar way to start the record. the weird electronic handclapping thing is cool, but i mean, i like dance music. a very "this could be love" track.

help me - at first i liked this song a lot. maybe because it's the single, i'm kinda tired of it now.

in vein - danny's songs are always so good. he's vaguely reminded me of moz in a weird way for years and years. that cute lisp thing he has sometimes shines through and makes his vocals that much more real. the whoa oh ohs in the chorus make for a nouveau trio signature.

over and out - this song kinda sounds like an angels and airwaves song through the intro.  trippy prog rock guitars and tons of rev 7 on the vocals.  the subject matter is very death oriented, so it fits with the trio image.  i'm a sucker for punk rock ballads, so admittedly, i really like this song.

i found away - this song is awesome.  this band can still amaze me.  almost from here to infirmary classic trio but with better production and cooler samples.

do you wanna know? - another dan song.  i love that the bass lines in his work are always in thr forefront, it makes his songs a little heavier.  very catchy chorus, it's no she took him to the lake or crawl though.

live young, die fast - a punk rock slow dance.  damned-ish subject matter in 2/4 time.

love love, kiss kiss - after multiple listens, i think this is one of my favorite songs on this album.  try and get this chorus out of your head.  

lost and rendered - at first i thought it might be a sequel to dead and broken.  skiba can still create awesome metaphors for the shit that goes on inside our heads.  a solid track.

ruin it - a different sort of dan song with kinda creepy bass lines and weird halloweenish guitar riffs.  i love when skiba and dan harmonize in the chorus though, it makes me happy.

into the night - this was the third song on the agony and irony EP, so i've heard slightly more than the other songs, although i will say that this was my favorite song on this album upon first listen.  very HWM split era trio, a great way to end this album.

i know this may be a bit premature, but i still love this band.

home auctions are so sad.

srsly

the 15th is way too far away.

aw hell no

um...

this totally reminds me of erica!

ftw

no one has any loyalty anymore. i have no more faith, and nothing left
to give.

i updated my muxtape.

it's all about having thee biggest crush. god, now i FEEL 10 years old too, making mixtapes for crushes.

freals

kris cut my bangs and i look like im 10 years old.  i'm really tired too.

wow

so apparently i had a huge party yesterday during haight st fair. i told sadaf i could count on one finger the amount of people I invited, but i guess my friends have friends who have friends. everything was fine until some losers started throwing stuff off my fire escape, then i had to talk to cops so i made everyone leave. i passed out drunk at like 8pm and now im awake at 530am and writing a blog.

hey new york, ill be there soon. don't melt before i get there. please, thank you!

this is really cute! she writes about touring with her two (absolutely adorable) children. it's such a fresh perspective, it kinda gives me hope.

oh yeah...

i'm totally smitten.

school of rock

these kids performing were sooo cool.

OH MY GOD

this is so amazing.

help!

how do i break up with someone im not even really dating?

this is good

bay to breakers

how many drunk meatheads can this city fit onto haight street in one day?  good thing bay to breakers exists so we can actually find out.

the top 5 albums i've been (sometimes secretly) loving this week:

yelle - pop up

playradioplay! - texas

weatherbox - american art

the kills - midnight boom

jim jones - harlem's american gangster

finally

http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/05/15/BAGAVNC5K.DTL

now if only the rest of america could hop on the bandwagon.  right wing christians will try and outlaw this in the upcoming primary.  i shouldn't have expected any less from the neocon army of ignorance.

it's also extremely too hot here.

worst video ever

sorry dudes. i love you. but this video sucks.

what is up with hurricane sf everyday? i hate the wind.

te amo mi perrito

todas las veces que tu dijo que tu me amó, nunca lo dije detrás. a veces, deseo que había escuchado mi corazón. estaba demasiado asustado de caer para ti.

if you have ever been in love

no matter what anyone will try and make me believe, this is the greatest feeling in the world.

ps

i lost my voice at bamboozle.

my week at a glance

my heart floats in the bay

i made it home.  thanks to the wonders of prescription pills, my flight consisted of me sleeping for 6 hours in uncomfortable positions thanks to the ogre sitting next to me.

it's cold here today.  i was so used to the heat of east coast already.  i miss my new york family already i want to go back.  fingers crossed, it could be really soon if this job is for real.

i'll post some random pictures i have on my phone soon, a lil documentation of the party we threw for ourselves every night.

erica and jessica get the hero of the year award for letting my drunk ass pass out at their beautiful house every night.  i cant thank you ladies enough.  my heart hurts with amount of love i have for you.

having to go to work tonight is such a bitter ending to such a glorious week.  now what i really want is a delicious drink.

xoxoxo

mission accomplished

i went to emo fest and all i got was drunk and sunburned.

i need a "getting over you" pill.

nick portalupi

"i'd say so

the first thing you might notice is that they were watching the bus

another thing you might notice is that nobody you are friends with has ever heard of cobra starship

so how much could their fans possibly matter"

the honorary title at slim's

mmmhmmm. i love this song, i love this man, i love this band.

In Honor

a great band, i will miss them.

gearing up

i hate the week of work before a vacation.  a normal work weeks seems to fly by so quickly that a friday seems like tuesday and before you know it, i'm writing a rent check again.

however, when all i want is for time to fly by, the exact opposite happens and it will feel like a month has passed when i finally get on that plane.

my guy situation is all a big mess right now.  usually it would be causing me extreme anxiety, but i have bigger and better things to be focusing on at this moment.  i can't wait to see you all, i'm so excited.

new york

STELLA

this reminds me of boston summer 2003. it also reminds me of azy and masek wearing matching parkas from my closet, being really stoned and pretty drunk with their arms around each other singing along to bittersweet symphony.

Champion @ POSI NUMBERS

this band means a lot to me. this weekend was a memorable one. after the car we came in broke down off the pennsylvania turnpike, me and my new friend somehow inadvertently hitchhiked the rest of the way to the kingston firehouse. i had two weeks worth of clothes in a duffel bag that was falling apart thanks to ATA airlines. it was an overwhelming feeling of relief when i showed up and all my friends from all over the country were in one place, three thousand and some odd miles from where i call home. these people are more than my friends, they are my family. while i may have "grown up" ; some will refer to me as a "dropout", hardcore will forever be a part of my life and the relationships i have made through this incredible scene i will take with me to my grave.
sorry to get all emo but i had to put it out there. this is also my favorite champion song.

obvs

you should probably expect more of this from me.

WOW

colleenbridget.muxtape.com

i dont know how to get that cool little tape thing on my blog.  

8 mile bike ride

vanessa escovar

"why? they are akward and uncomfortable until they are funy and ben
stiller."

mazal tov!

i want jewish children.

muxtape

in light of erica and jessica creating some fab lists, i will make one.
my computer, however, is on its way to apple heaven (and rather
quickly). when i buy my new laptop, expect some (not so) killer jams
that probably only amuse me. i swear to god im ten years behind.

best thing ever

some random pictures

day off in santa cruz, set yr goals at fillmore, dead to me.